Election 2012

With about nine weeks left until the election, it seems that Republicans and Democrats are pretty evenly split on their choice of candidates. Of course, this depends on which polls and media outlets you follow. I'm an Independent voter and have never understood the rationale behind voting a straight party ticket. After all, doesn't each side have some clunkers that shouldn't be in office? Some will say that's just politics and you have to take the bad with the good. I say, "Bullcrap!" That's why I like to elect candidates from both parties, who have the ability to reach across the aisle and negotiate, compromise, and get things done.

Regardless of which candidate or party you support, I don't think I've ever seen the country more divided than it is today. Our ideology is like daylight and dark, heads or tails, black and white, and so on. So, now the consensus is that the Independents, or swing voters, will decide the election. These are called the undecided. Undecided? Are you kidding me? Is this mysterious group of people aliens, who just landed on earth, or maybe people who just woke up from being in a coma for years? Perhaps these are the ones you see at the grocery store just standing in the cereal aisle like zombies, unable to make a decision on which one to buy. Or, maybe they're the ones sitting in their recliners with television remote in hand, flipping the guide to try to decide what to watch. When they finally do make a decision, there's only ten minutes left of a one-hour program.

So, the fate of the country lies in the hands of voters who can't make a decision. They're just like the politicians who are now in office. Isn't this the reason our country is in a mess in the first place? These voters may be waiting on the outcome of the future debates of the candidates. You know, this is where intelligent questions are asked by the moderators such as "who is your favorite superhero?" or "what toppings do you like on your pizza?" Then maybe, just maybe, they will finally come to a sound decision of who they think is the best liar.

Get Out and Vote, or Maybe Not

Well, it's here...another election year and the political parasites are out in full force, invading our homes and our right to privacy. The robocalls and the smooth talkers are calling at all hours of the day and night, begging for our votes.

If you or I constantly made harassing phone calls to complete strangers, we would undoubtedly be arrested and put in jail. If they are lucky enough to get through to us without being hung up on, do they really think we're going to believe their B.S., be swayed to change our minds, or even remember their names by the time we get to our polling places?

Television ads are no different. They all make the same disparaging claims about their opponents, and even hire the same voice announcer to deliver their messages from different sides.

Yard signs are another waste of resources. If your neighbor down the street has a yard sign touting "Joe Blow," but you don't like the neighbor because he lets his dog run loose in the neighborhood, then "Joe Blow" is probably not going to get your vote.

A lot of people will blindly stumble into the voting booth and vote for a "Mike Smith" instead of someone named "Harold Halfwitt" only to find out later that "Mike Smith" was running on the Communist Neo-Nazi ticket.

Yes, it's our constitutional right and privilege to vote, even if we are completely uninformed about the candidates and totally stupid about their platform and political agenda. Then, we can sit back and bitch the next four years about what losers they are. Or, if we don't have a clue, we could do the country a service and just stay home on election day.

In all seriousness, make it a point to get informed about the candidates and what they stand for before casting your votes. It's not only a right and privilege, but your duty.